I’ve Been All Around the World

We tried L.A. – not always nice
Led way to Houston for my cap and gown from Rice
But Utah called…
Our paradise!
I’ve been all around the world!

Exotic places – exotic things
Where I once explored the Valley of the Kings
The pharaoh’s tomb
And offerings
I’ve been all around the world!

Those Spanish girls – so underfed!
Every meal was just salami and some bread
“I’ll have the green
Egg dish instead”
I’ve been all around the world!

With Russians and – a few Chinese
In Dos Hermanos, we all prayed for a breeze
Aboard the train
Bound for Cádiz!
I’ve been all around the world!

I sailed on through – the tightest span
Where Teddy furrowed a big stick across the land
Oh, Panama:
A man! A plan!
I’ve been all around the world!

East meets west – if you navigate
Where the Patagonian penguins come to mate
Magellan dared
To steer me “Strait”
I’ve been all around the world!

The midnight sun – held back the night
As we walked the decks in blankets wrapped up tight
The glaciers: blue
The snow fields: white
I’ve been all around the world!

Some might say – I sure took my time
They might list the mountain tops I never climbed
But I maintain
I did just fine
I’ve been all around the world!

Won a trip – to Bourbon Street
That cockroach po’boy looked ‘bout good enough to eat
Gumbo’s hot!
And beignets, sweet
I’ve been all around the world!

I saw the Sphinx – his dusty smile
I saw the pyramids along the river Nile
Oh, what a land!
Ruled by a child
I’ve been all around the world!

On cobblestones – we entertained
Cloggers boiled them cabbage down all over Spain
And on those plains,
No sign of rain!
I’ve been all around the world!

In gay Paree (Oui, oui!) – with just an hour
Never doubted in our tour guide’s beaucoup power
We got as far (Ooh, la, la!)
As the Eiffel Tower
I’ve been all around the world!

By the banks – of the Iguazú
A sacrificial princess fled in her canoe
But then fell in,
And we did too
I’ve been all around the world!

Still perplexed — at dynasties
That gave us: kites & noodles, gunpowder & tea…
But offered SQUAT
For poo and pee!
I’ve been all around the world!

I rode the range – in Dixie Land
I held the Virgin’s ruddy waters in my hands
I’ve never been
Another place as grand
I’ve been all around the world!